LOL remember Dad month

Sorry to pee on the Dad party fellow bloggers, but people need to know that it's not all rainbow's and lollipops when it comes to Dads. You know the deal, mine sucks.

I really have no good memories of my Dad except for the time I asked my Mom for something and she said no, so I went and asked my Dad for the exact same thing and he said yes. Then they had a huge fight and I got in twice as much shit... and got my ass kicked in the process. Good times!

Another distinct memory I have of him was when he shaved his moustache, I didn't actually recognize him at first, and my sister started crying.

Oh then the big one was when he came into my bedroom with my mother after they had been fighting and asked me a question that every eight year old should be able to answer:

Who would you rather live with, your Mom or your Dad?

Great. Thanks for putting me on the spot! I'll take, Mom for $1 Alex, thank you very much. It wasn't really that hard of a question, but I had to at least let him think it was tough by not answering them right away (I just realized I was slow rolling them at the age of 8).

The only thing my Dad has really taught me, is how not to be a Father. For that, I owe him deeply. For if it wasn't for his selfish greedy attitude I would not be who I am today, and neither would my sister. It all worked out and trust me when I say this: for the better. I still look back and wonder what could have been had he just realized the effect he truly had on my life. One that I will never forgot, and one day... might eventually forgive. I blame a lot of the trama I went through as a child on him. A fatherless child who's mother maxed out her credit cards and went into extreme debt just to make ends meet. All the while he sent me presents and letters that really did more damage than good. I still have a gold ring that he sent me with my initials on it. I never wore it once.

He's still alive, and I think he is doing ok. I have no idea to tell you the truth. I used to care, I used to try and reach out to him. I still stick to my guns though. If he wants to talk to me or make ammends, he knows where to find me so get on a plane and figure it out! It's the least he could do.

Zeldathon

Ever play Legend of Zelda as a kid? What about now on the Wii?

Check this out.

It just started, and they are taking donations for a great cause. The more donations they get, the longer they will play. They could be playing for years!

Willy just reminded me of the times we spent playing NES at my place and his. We only lived about an eight iron away from each other growing up. Dominos pizza was the food of choice. On weekends we'd also ride up to the corner store and play Street Fighter II. When we were hard up for quarters we would get together and roll our pennies in order to get in a few games.

Ahhhh, the simple times. Being a kid is so awesome.

Yes, I will be THAT guy at SCOOP

I have registered for a SCOOP NLHE event tomorrow. I have no intention of showing up as the time and the date are totally inconvenient to a normal 8-6ers weekday work schedule. So I've signed up using my SCOOP ticket that I won a while back in a free roll after placing an obnoxious badge/blog post up on this here space (last time for you Pokerstars).

So I will be one of many hundreds who will be annoying you to no end as you battle for my blinds. One guy will take them while others try to take a stand get ass fucked on the river with a call all in with their pocket 8's while the stealer wakes up with a real hand for the first time in 10 attempts. Take a stand! I dare you. My chips are your chips, please enjoy.

This will officially mark the final time I "play" in a poker tournament at Pokerstars. Once I cash out my FPP's later this week I will be closing my account for good.

GL to all you suckers. I can't wait to see the next "promotion" they come up with for the poker blogging community.

Fucked Up Friday - The Apple Chucker Gang

When I was in grade 3 we used to always hang outside the school before the bell and chuck apple cores at big semi trucks passing by. We would try and hit the trailer portion of the truck. So every morning I would eat an apple on the way to school and save the core. We'd wait for the perfect moment and fire away. Then we would run for it.

It was only a matter of time before one of the apple chucker gang got caught, I just never thought it would be me.

Well one morning I decided I couldn't wait for a semi-truck to pass by and decided I would throw it at a smaller truck. Boom! I struck the back of a canopy style truck and then the driver slammed on the breaks. Oh shit! So I ran for it as I usually would but this time I decided to run and hide behind one of those hollowed out bushy type of trees up against the side of the school. The ones that have been there for years and years and kids have been using them as forts or hideouts.

So I snuck into one of those against the school and thought I had gotten away with it free and clear. I took a quick peak from behind the bush and sure enough this big burley man was coming straight for my bush. The other kids must have told on me because I was sure that I had ran fast enough to evade the unsuspecting driver.

A few seconds later the is a deep voice from outside the bush yelling "come out of there kid!" "you come out right now!!"

I was scared. In fact, I was very fucking scared. I thought this guy was going to kick my ass! I had no choice but to sulk my way out from behind my hiding spot and he immediately grabbed my arm with a firm grip and walked me straight to the principal's office.

On the way there, I felt this urge to take a pee. I really had to go. I told the grumpy old man the same. His response was "well too bad, you're going straight to the principal!"

So I did what every grade three boy would do when he really has to go and is very nervous. You know that feeling in your gut when you know you have done something wrong? I had that. I had it bad. So bad that I just let it go and peed my pants!

So there I was, waiting in the office for my mom to come and pick me up. I got it bad when I got home too. My mom's rule was always "twice as bad at home."

Boy did that one hurt. I think she might have broken two wooden spoons that night and my ass was on fire for two days.

Side Show Schaubs

We were having family dinner last week and somehow this saying came up and we all realized what a great tongue twister it is...

Say it 10 times fast, I dare you.

Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs
Side Show Schaubs

Did you do it? Tough right?

I forget how the conversation went, but obviously one of my family members was trying to burn me on something that involved me being a total side show. Sometimes I get that way...

Have a good weekend. I'll be golfing tomorrow and then Mother's Day on Sunday. Except my mom is away! So it is time with Nana and the Mother-in-law instead. The weather is supposed to be beautiful tomorrow for golf. Can't wait. Sunday I will also be watching the Players Championship at TPC Sawgrass. I wonder if Tiger will make the cut today? He shot 70 yesterday and is only 4 off the lead.

Anyway, this is side show schaubs signing off.

Baseball is a pain in the neck

I continued my Mookie hiatus as a result of me being needed on the ball field. In fact we showed up last night with only 8 players (we only had 2 girls). Nick and I played the outfield on our own, and we held our own quite nicely. Nick is a bomber, he jacked two HR's and the rest of our team did what they normally do which is - get on base. We took the auto out in the 9 spot but that didn't seem to slow us down as we eventually mercied the team 14-2 and we were out of there half way through the 2nd period of the Canucks game. No need to rush back though since we had a radio at the field, oh and the Canucks were down 2-0 to the shithawks already.

Back to the game though and the reason for this post title. I hit one right back at the pitcher and initially it looked like he grabbed it cleanly so I didn't give it much of a run. Then he bobbled it, and bobbled it again. Fucker. So I had to run for it and give it a go... sure enough I kick it into gear and out pops a fart. Oh, I say to myself that's extra propulsion and I kick it into a whole new gear and almost out run that bumbling bobbling idot of an opposing pitcher. Trying my best I snag my foot on first base and start to go down. Knowing I am going down everything starts to happen in slow motion. I put a hand down but somehow my front right side of my forehead hits the dirt first. Luckily the rules state we need to be wearing a helmet. So the brim of the lid gets caught on the dirt, dirt flies all over my face and into my beard. I scrape my left leg and hand on my way down.

Thankfully I didn't see any stars (which reminds me... you suck pokerstars), I was just a bit stunned and was back on my feet in no time. We only had 8 players after all and I told myself I wasn't coming out of the game. Now I sit here with a sore neck and a brusied hand. It feels like whiplash.

On my way back to the dugout I said the pitcher "this all could have been avoided if you would have just made a clean play on the ball."

SCOOP is a Joke Part II

AYFKM?

Last night's SCOOP tournaments are still running!!

The small one just ended.
The medium one is HU.
The large one is down to 8 players with an average stack of 71BB's.

WHAT A FUCKING JOKE.

EVER HEARD OF DAY 2 JOKERSTARS?

You'd think that after 14-16 hours of play they might consider letting the players come back to play again the following day. Who runs that fucking joke of a site anyway? Give your teeny tiny little heads a shake!

It's offical - my ticket will now go unused. I can not justify playing through an entire night and into the morning, missing work even if it is a huge loooooog shot of me going that deep. I refuse to play in any further blogger events sponsored by Pokerstars. FULL TILT ALL THE WAY!!

Props to Cmitch for pointing this out to me.

SCOOP is a joke

I can't really go on in detail as Poker Grump has in the past. All I know is that Poker Stars sucks balls compared to Full Tilt. I'm struggling to find a tournament that I can use my $11 ticket on and it looks like my only chance will be next Tuesday (I'm playing golf later today instead for an interclub scratch league match).

I'll probably have to show up late to next week's event because of the West Coast unfriendly start time of 5pm PST so that adds even more to the suckdom that already is JokerStars. Oh well, I guess free money is free money, but I did work for that ticket and now I will probably have nothing to show for it. I'll keep you posted. I just think it is totally retarded how they tried to get me to write FIVE more posts linking their site for what, $22 (LOL ticket not cash!)? No thanks. If I was at the top of the Pokerstars food chain I'd probably consider firing the entire marketing department. They are that dumb.

What's with the no shows?

Seriously people. You are in a freeroll where a dude (ALCANTHANG) pulls out all the stops to get you in... and you don't even show? WTF is wrong with you? Have you no gratitude? I find it to be pretty low class for those who don't go that extra mile to show. I know that I have personally skipped out on a couple of family dinners and have also cancelled other plans, just to take advantage of this amazing oppoortunity. I mean seriously, WHAT THE FUCK? I even skipped the Keg last night. The money I won would have almost paid for my steak and crab too.

I will accept all reasonable excuses. However, you must realize how frustrating you are to the rest of the table that did show up. I mean it takes almost two hours for your stack to blind off. It is retardedly annoying to see people continuously try and steal those blinds. One person usually does all the pushing around and the others try to take a stance. Sure enough the bully sucks out on the dude with the better hand who has enough of that stealing blinds shit and they get ass fucked.

My point should not be misunderstood. I love me some dead stacks. In any other tournament I would be happy. But when Al goes to the lengths he has gone to and does whatever he can to try include EVERYONE then that is where it gets ridiculous. There are some bloggers who are not even part of the free roll, heck I even saw Shrike railing for most of the tournament and then realized he was not in it. Not sure how that happened, but I am glad he is on the rail for obvious reasons. I am sure there are others too.

Seriously, show up or shut up.

A good start to May 2010

I might try and fix this later, but its time for sleep now. Use your magnifying glass if needed...

HU lasted a good 40 hands and we finally chopped it up after having even stacks and only 10BB left each.

I'll take the money and run. I've only played in about 6-8 of these so far.

Have a good weekend.

Shows/Movies I've never seen or barely watch

In no particular order:

- Avtar (I want to be the only person in the world to have never seen it)
- Star Trek (movie & show)
- The Simpsons (movie and show)
- The news (I hate watching tragic stories after work)
- Everybody loves Raymond

These are just the ones that come to mind right away. Obviously there are a ton more shows/movies I've never seen. In fact, I rarely ever watch movies any more. They seem to take up too much time and I have a short attention span. Like Waffles.

However, unlike waffles - back in my late teens I was trying to get laid instead of playing WoW, Dungeons and Dragons, or taking apart computers and putting them back together again.

Actually wait, when I was a teen, waffffffles was still old and probably already grey/ghey.

My Cat the alarm clock (poker content)

My big cat weighs about 14 pounds, his name is Rocky. My small cat weighs about 7 pounds, his name is Frank. This morning I must have hit the off button instead of the snooze because 45 minutes later Rocky was climbing all over me telling me I was late... but in reality he was probably just hungry again. Seriously, Rocky is like a dog. He will eat until there is nothing left, and then go and bully Frank out of the way and finish his. If we didn't keep an eye on Frank, he'd starve and Rocky would tip the 20 pound mark.

I skipped the Mookie as predicted and played ball instead. This being our second game in two days, I was sore from game one but luckily didn't pull anything to warrant sitting out in game two. Good thing because we only had nine players last night. We won 20-8 bringing our total runs for to 41 and against to 26. A good start to say the least.

I look forward to Sunday's free roll. I feel a deep run coming, but as I witnessed last night when I got home from ball with only 20 people left - people are willing to flip for 100BB pots. I guess when the only real prize is first place, you want to have the dominating stack at the final table. But seriously, that is just nuts. No one folds anymore. Even to a 4Bet shove. I don't care what type of table image you might think someone has, stacking off with a small pair is bound to happen if you are not careful. Bloggers never amaze me anymore and I for one am the first to admit that I have no game when it comes to final tables so I might just have to take that flip early and often. Pokermeister proved that it worked last night, you just have to have a little run good on your side or you are on the rail wondering what just happened to your 40BB stack.

Round 2 of the NHL playoffs kicks off tonight and I am pumped! Chicago will win the series (cm). Later.

Google Reader FTW

Well that was easy. I have no idea what took so long but I am glad I am finally over at google reader. The only annoying part is that they marked all blogs as unread so that was a bit frustrating have to click on every single one and "mark as unread." Other than that it is great. I especially like the feature where even though you have read a particular blog, it just doesn't disappear after you have clicked on it like it does with bloglines. You can go back and click through that link and the post will still be there. I like. So I am slowly getting through all of the old "unread" post but after that it will be smooth sailing. I also like how it automatically places everything alphabetically. That is a way better feature once you get used to it. Better than the other which was having them shown in the order they were added. Harsh annoying fo shizzle. I'm 95% certain that I won't be ther for the mookie this week as I have a ball game tonight. LLB with veryjosie will have to wait, as agreed. I plan on losing gracefully (costanzamethod) and shipping her the $11 promptly. So yeah, ball game (see: excercise finally) followed by a few beers tonight instead of internet poker. No brainer even if there is a TOC seat up for grabs. As if I am going to win one of those (cm)...

Hey Bloglines guess what?

I am done with you. You suck. You never update consistently and rarely are you ever on time. I find myself going to the blogs directly instead of counting on you for updates. You suck old lady saggy titties with chewed up nipples. Fuck you Bloglines. I am moving to Google Reader!

For every Blogger

For every Rooster, there is a dbcooper or VeryJosie that take a seat down at the latest BBT. The BBT5. So far there are 85 registered for this week's Mookie Championship and more importantly... a TOC seat.

I want some of this action.

The Mookie Revival BBT5 event #3

Yes, of course I will be there! Won't you? You better be, because I want your chips! All of them and as soon as possible please. BDR will be in full effect so I suggest you tune in early and often. I have seen the o/u line set at 120 entries. I think it will get crushed. Take the over. If Monday's tournament is any sign of things to come then yeah, obviously we are going to hit at least 120, maybe even 150. People will be coming out of everywhere to play in this long standing classic. It might not have it's host there, but we will all be thinking of him nonetheless. I want my profile damn it! I swear, if I win I am going to do my own profile anyway. The questions are always the same so it should be no problem. Dork. Yeah so. Suck it Trebek. I am sure there will be a lot of fishy dead money (including me) so make sure you get those stacks in behind and donk away!

BBT5 is a go

Alcanthang Alcantghang Alcanthang


Tournament: p0ker From the Rail
When: Monday, April 19th through May 24th starting at 22:00ET
Game: Deepstack NLHE
Buyin: $24+2 (or token)*
Password: 2010WSOP

Tournament: The Mookie
When: Wednesday, April 21st through May 26th starting at 22:00ET
Game: Deepstack NLHE
Buyin: $10+1*
Password: vegas1

*Winner also receives ToC entry

Tournament: Battle of the Blogger Tournaments Invitational
When: Sunday, April 18th through May 23rd starting at 19:00ET
Game: Deepstack NLHE
Buyin: Restricted freeroll**

**$2,000 Prizepool + 1st and 2nd place receive ToC entry

Tournament: Blogger Battle Royale
When: Sunday, June 6th starting at 14:00ET
Game: Deepstack NLHE
Buyin: Freeroll for BBT participating bloggers

_________________________________
See ya there.

NHL Playoffs 2010

Who is your favorite team?
Who are you cheering for to win Lord Stanley's Cup?

The Canucks went to overtime last night to decide game one vs. the LA Kings. It was a great game so hopefully you caught some of it...

Yeah right eh.

I love this time of year because we get 3-4 hockey games EACH NIGHT. It is awesome. I am in Astin's hockey pool. Actually I got together with three others here and we entered 5 teams in total. Time to take this thing down after three years of trying.

I'm not going to do any Stanley Cup predicitions this year because I have come to the conclusion that I am waffles-esque when it comes to cooler powers. Call me the Canadian cooler or Schwafuls as some of my blogger pals have called me in the past.

I just seem to have a knack for calling something out, and then the opposite happens. That is why I am a huge fan of the Costanza method (TM).

Just make your picks and then do the opposite. You will be surprised how well that works.

Mookie Reminder

Look at your notes!!

First hand of the night I try to defend my BB and don't even think to look at my notes on BDR co-host Joanada1111111!!!! and try and outplay her on the turn. She didn't fall for it and I gave away half my stack on the first hand. I am a pokertard sometimes, but you knew that. She called me down with 10's. I guess she just didn't believe me. Next time, I will have the goods. Didn't make it to the veryjosie tournament in time. Life got in the way. I foresee life getting in the way a lot in the not so distant future. I hope to compete in the next unofficial BBTFIVE and possibly win a seat to the TOC. Obviously I am a huge underdog longshot but hey you just never know. Oh, and of course I will go to the ME if I win a seat, how could I pass up an opportunity like that!

Bring it on.

Oh yeah, I played Poker last Friday

I always forget to talk about poker these days. I totally forgot that I played some cash game action over at the River Rock casino on Friday night. I guess the reason I forgot was, well... I was drunk. Drunk poker is not good poker and should be forgotten as quickly as possible. Friday night started out with me taking off from work on time (imagine that) and then whipping over to my home course to join up with Thordong, Funk and Penski on the back nine. Nothing eventful there. After that we went upstairs for some burgers, nachos, riblets and of course... more booze. We drank and played some pool, gambled of course. Then went over to the shed and played darts. Drank more and watched sports highlights. It starts to get fuzzy right around then. I think it was about 10pm by the time we got there. All of the sudden it was midnight and it was Penski's 40th bday. So we drank some more. At 2am we decided that it was time to play some cards so we got a ride over to the casino from Funk. Funk went home because he had a tee time for the next morning. When we arrived at the poker room we managed to get two of us at the same table for 1/2. Thordog was on his own but then I grabbed him and moved him when a seat openned up. So there we were, drunk at 230am side by side playing 1/2 NL and there were 7 other regulars staring at us licking there chops. I fronted Thordog a $100 buyin. Penkski came up with the idea that we would all payout everyone's buyin's from our total earnings for the night. I have done this before with him and came out ahead. I can't remember much poker but I do remember rivering a set of tens and spewed my first $140 when the guy rivered a flush. I couldn't get away from it and paid him off. I went and grabbed $200 more and ran that up to $350 while beratting a kid who thought he was pro. I just kept telling him that Math was calling. He was a little whiny bitch for sure. I remember that much. Thorndog ended up folding for an hour and then doubled up with Aces. Patience pays off sometimes. Penksi spewed $200 so all in all he was the only one who lost anything once we transfered Thornog's winnings to him. I think he ended down $50 or whatever. We left at 5:30am and I was in bed by 6am. Masters was starting in 6.5 hours and I had to get up for that obv.

[ x ] BBT5

I've heard rumors but nothing official. I look forward to a fresh start and a new challenge. Full Tilt is still the only site I play. Not sure what that is, but it's just ended up that way. I have one measly add on the right there and its not even for Full tilt so don't click it. I wish I had a Full Tilt ad, but no one will pay me anything anymore. Poor me LOL. I guess it is because my blog is about as ghey as it gets and I really am just a D-list hack that can't write to save his life. I often wonder why I still come here and pimp and write this mindless drivel.

Ok. Restart.

FULL TILT.

I'm going to try and get in to as many events as I can and hopefully get a seat to the TOC (I assume there will be one of some sort). I need to save up every penny I've got to make sure I have enough for the first few buyins. Heck, I'll even reload if I have to. I still have over $150 there so that might last me a while, I hope.

I feel more pressure to play well in this one for some reason... I need to win a Mookie and this is perfect timing to give it a shot. I just know all the pros will come out of the woodwork as they always do in these things so I don't really like my chances, but hey you just never know right?

Can't win if you don't play!

The Masters 2010

That was awesome.

Congrats Phil. Sucked in Tiger, I knew you wouldn't be able to pull it off. Everyone here knows already that I am a Tiger golf fan. However, I just knew he wouldn't take it down. I should have bet Phil Ivey... that is how confident I was.

If anyone was going to pull it off though, it would have been Tiger. But seriously, who in their right mind would bet against him? It was definitely interesting to see it all play out. I really was pulling for Couples.... now THAT would have been amazing. A 50 year old dude running around in skater shoes and no socks and beating up a bunch of young pup's in their prime?

That would have topped Butler winning the NCAA championship. Alas, neither of those came to fruition and we are sitting here looking at Phil with his 3rd green jacket and the hated Duke Blue Devils with another championship. Both great champions who's only chance of losing on the final day was if they gave it away themselves.

Phil took some ballsy risks and they paid off. Well done Lefty.

Bloggers are writers now?

Not me.

I ain't so good at that reading comprehension stuff either.

I think I got a P in English 12. Wait... yep, I did.

I was too busy playin' sports and chicks all at the same time.

I feel so dumb for enjoying school the way I did. What was I thinking.

Anyone who blogs and claims to be a writer, better get paid for it or at least plan on getting paid for it. The rest are just like me. Wasting time.

That shit is hard work. Maybe I should quit and focus on other things.

Like reading comprehension.

Anyone got a wet paper bag?

Golf is Dangerous

The shot above set off a wave of events that, for the most part, got me rethinking my whole obsession with hitting golf balls out into the ocean. For over 15 years now, there has been one consistent activity that I partake in whenever I go away on a trip. Whether it is camping, my honeymoon or a golf trip with the guys - I have always had the need to pound a few balls out into a lake, a river or the ocean, which is always within walking distance from our vacation spot. The more that I think about it now, the more I realize it was that famous episode of Seinfeld when George lives the lie of a Marine Biologist and pulls out Kramer's titleist from a whale's blowhole (still the best hole in one story I have heard to this day... fast forward the first 30 seconds) that inspired me to carry on with this odd obsession.

There was one year when we were camping and I had brought an entire shag bag of range balls. It was great fun because we each took a turn ripping an old three wood out into the lake. Sometimes there are things to aim at, like people on floaties, and other times it's just a long drive contest. Heh.

The photo below was my next tee box, and as soon as I saw it from our balcony I mentally booked a tee time with that sucker at some point during the weekend. Saturday afternoon ended up being the day and time that the latest installment would take place. When you look at it from the balcony it just looks like a rock with some grass on top... the perfect tee box right?

In fact, it was a dream tee box. I had never seen something like it before. Usually I just find a place on the beach and hit from there. Other times I find a dock and hit it right off the deck. This time was special because not only was the view and hitting area perfect, there was actual grass to hit off! It felt like it was my destiny to make it out to that rock and pound a few into the sunset.

With drivers, beers and golf balls in hand, we made our way to the beach while the girls had a nap. We had played 9 holes earlier where I happened to pull off something I had never done before on any 9 hole adventure. I made 9 three's in a row. I hit all 9 greens in regulation and 2 putted all 9 greens to shoot 2 under. How? Well there were two drivable par 4's (245 and 210 yards each) and I hit those greens as well. Good times. Kinda a brag I know, but hey this is my space!

Anyway, here is a picture of the rock before we made the climb up:


When we arrived at the top we were greated by a Canadian Goose:

She didn't hang out too long. She made it clear that we were not wanted and did not appreciate us being up there. I was a bit confused because I knew that people were going up there all the time. I mean look at the path that has been worn in by passers by.

She hissed a couple of times and then flew off! Down to the ocean below she went and joined up with her partner. I assume he was a male, but they all look the same to me. He was pissed off and didn't appreciate us being up there one bit. When the bird flew off we looked down on the ground and guess what we found:

Yep - 8 eggs! Needless to say we were very shocked to see this little nest. However, we kept out distance and did not disturb or touch anything whatsoever. We did, however, continue on with the plan. Hit the balls out into the ocean. We came with a plan and wanted to see it through.

We kept our distance and began to hit a few shots. No big deal, we stuck to the opposite side of the nest and pounded a couple of drivers. We took some video and took a few shots along with the ones above. Then, I think I took it a bit too far. I decided to hit a shot out into the sunset so I need to aim a bit further left. So I tee'd one up and fired one about 30 yards to the right of the Geese below.

Well this is where the Dad got really pissed. In hindsight this whole adventure was a mistake. Not much I could do about it at the time, but I guess the loud sound of the ball against the club face must have startled the Dad Goose because he took off in flight and so did the Mom. They both took off in seperate directions and ten seconds later they were heading straight for us from both sides. We were being dive bombed by these parents who thought, possibly, that we might actually be hitting these goose eggs and not our golf balls. The Dad was literally two feet from us as he buzzed by. We were scared! ;)

The mom landed at the entrance way to the top of the rock and basically started screeching at us relentlessly. She was hissing and flapping her wings. At this point we were feeling pretty bad about the whole situation. We didn't mean to bring any harm to the birds or their eggs. In fact, we kept telling the goose this information in the hopes that she would somehow understand what we were trying to say. For some reason, she just didn't understand....

Meanwhile the Dad Goose flew off to go and get help. Or so we assumed. Soon after he returned with another goose and they once again buzzed by us showing us their displeasure with us still being up on THEIR rock.

Once the mom was up there again, we decided to pack it in. We still had about 3-4 balls left each, but we didn't want to draw anymore attention to the situation and decided to leave down the back rock face instead. It was a tough climb down as there weren't any real worn out "stairs" but we managed and the mother goose resumed her position on top of her kids.

All in all, it was definitely an odd experience. I have never had such a run in with these types of birds before, other than the golf course. I won't try and condone what we did, or make excuses for some of the choices we made. Overall, nothing was disturbed and no birds were hurt in this adventure. However, it surely has changed my view on the whole process and it certainly has openned my eyes to re-evaluate the whole decision to do something similar in the future.

Maybe I'll just stick to the driving range from now on... but probably not.

Mookieless and Profileless

Still no wins in the Mookie (which means no profile... although Mookie has put an end to those... which is great because I would be choked!) It's not like I play that often... in fact I didn't think I even had enough to join tonight. When I got home I found out I had $13 left so I decided to let it ride.

Good thing I did!

No need to recap... since I didn't actually win. Right now, as I type this I gotta say that I am pretty choked that I didn't pull it off. However, having not much practice in HU... I'll take the cash right about now. I was playing well, Lola started watching me... and well... having my hot wife watch me try and win my first Mookie was a bit of challenge. Nonetheless, I was glad she was there, and she congratulated me after. So that is all that counts. :)

AugB10 is the only one who beat me... no idea who he is. Congrats.

Pinkystinky was 3rd
Buddydank was 4th
ABNBrendan was 5th (Lucko's buddy?)
Fuel55 was 6th
Keepfloppin was 7th
Twoblackaces was bubble boy

Thanks to all 62 participants... I needed the BR boost!

IF I had won, I would have received a lot of "ha ha April fools right?" type of comments for sure.

Be careful out there... don't get levelled.

Dumb Post

That last post was a total downer. Sorry about that. I will try and find time to write something substantial soon. Move along for now, but be sure to come back and hear about how I almost got taken out by a Canadian Goose. It was scary.

Grounded Out

Blogging has become a grind. This mindless rambling is worthless. Staring at this map, gazing at all the places I will never go to is depressing. I've got nothing, sorry.

Monday Ramble

This is more like it. I ramble good. Lola read my last two posts and wondered if I was giving up too much information about my personal life. I didn't agree and told her that it was good therapy to be talking this shit out here. I've been wanting to get a little more personal here from time to time so I hope my many many readers don't get bored with this crap. A part of me wishes that my dad would somehow find this space. Another part of me thinks he doesn't deserve to find it. I'd never send him the link but I think it would be fun to one day send him something and say "this is what you've missed lately." That would be sweet, or is that just mean? Regardless, he's a selfish fucker who really doens't give two shits so I am sure he would just open it and be like "maybe I'll get to that someday." I think he had a stroke or something like that last year. Which sucks. I think there was a chance he was gonna pass away too, but he g0t through it and is now back at home. It is weird because obviously my nana still talks to my aunt and she also talks to my dad. I am positive that she fills him in from time to time, but on what I have no idea. My nana was put in the toughest spot of them all as you can imagine. Her oldest daughter stole her grandchildren's father and up and moved to another country. That can't be easy and is often impossible to explain to the masses. We had another nice weekend here and I managed to hit the links and played 9 holes Saturday and 18 on Sunday. The final snowman took place and I didn't do that well. I had two deuces that netted me $10 a piece and shot -1 which really got me nothing. I am glad it is over now so I can play more at my home course. I'm thinking of quitting that place after 20 years of being a member as I could surely find something better to do with that money. However I would just play golf elsewhere and probably a lot less. Decisions, decisions. I will stick it out one more year and go from there. Fuck I was eating my bagel in my car this morning and I splatted some jam & peanut buttter right on to my pants. Now I'm walking around the rest of the day with this redish/brown spot on the front of my pants right in "the package area." As you can imagine, it looks ridiculous and if I didn't tell you what happened you would probably wonder what the fuck I was up to this morning. Not good. Needless to say I have spent the entire day in my office and will not leave unless absolutely necessary. I'm still making some changes to the site as you might have noticed. Very subtle. I also applied to have my page rank reviewed. I am not sure how that works but I thought I would give it a shot. I want to go to Belize. It is nice there and those foam parties look absolutely nuts. I would love to get lost in a sea of foam right about now.

Happy Monday.

Lord, I was born a rambling man

I've had that song stuck in my head all morning. I keep singing it because I've come to the conclusion that I'm not any sort of writer that strings together a proper post. I'll just continue this new rambling style of mine and see what comes out. Man it's sunny today. Makes me want to skip the afternoon and play golf. Or I could be watching March madness. At least I'll catch some of the games tonight. We were thinking of going to a movie though. It's been way too long since I've been in a theatre. I miss popcorn too. There's just something about hot buttery popcorn isn't there? So good for you too. Ok not really, but as if there is anything good for you at a movie house. They only sell junk. So I keep staring at this map of the world here trying to figure out where I should go on our next vacation. Realistically it won't be for a couple of years. A big trip that is. Like HoP said, the key is to have family take on the little one(s) and then find a place to go where the adults can play. I assume that when the kids are super young that it won't be that bad. Like if we went to Hawaii or something the kid would just sleep all the time anyway. Still someone has to be there. It's not like we can just leave the little baby in the room while we are down at the beach drinking fancy umbrella drinks. No chance. So I guess it is just planning phase type stuff right now. Chile would be a good place to go. Looks like a really skinny country on the map as it extends down the left side a good portion of South America. The majority of the countries in South Africa seem to be about the same size. Weird. Whereas you look at Brazil and it is huge. Why didn't they split that up into a bunch of countries. Wonder how that works. Fuck it, who cares. I still would like to make a trip to Australia again. I have a lot of cousin's there. A few from both sides of my family actually. My mom has two sisters and they both live there right now. Both for different reasons. I told you that my dad is Australian right? Well he has 6 brothers and they all have kids. Nuts. But hey, I have lots of places to stay all over both coastlines, which is cool. My mom's younger sister moved to Oz about 10ish years ago. Not sure. Anyway she is great and I miss her. My other aunt lives with my Dad. Yes, I just said that. My mom's sister married my dad. So my aunt is my stepmom. Sweet huh? Not really. It's quite fucked up actually. It's made me stronger though. So yeah, my dad took off with my aunt and he is now my uncle dad. I used to call him that on the phone to piss him off when I was a young teen rebelling against everything that was family. My mom kept us grounded though. If it wasn't for her I have no idea where I would be right now. Probably on the streets smokin' crack. Who knows.

Later.

Bankroll spewage, rambleage

I tried to work at my bonus two nights ago and spewed off most of my roll on rush fucking poker. I hate it. I am glad I am almost broke online though. It will allow me to concentrate on other things like family. The good stuff. I don't talk much about family here because really, who wants to hear about that mushy stuff. Lots of good stuff in the works though which will be revealed in due time. I feel like rambling on about nothing right now. So I am going to type whatever comes to mind and then when I run out of things to say I will just hit post. Waffles is the biggest cooler I've ever seen but I somehow have my own cooler powers if you haven't noticed. I made some changes to my blogroll. If you want to be added, let me know. That includes you lurkers out there too. I have a map of the world in my office. Cool huh. It makes me realize how big this planet is and how many places I want to see before I die. I want to start a family too. So how is that going to work? If I start one soon, then travel is out of the question for what like 20 years? Fun trips anyway. Do I really want to take my kids on vacations with me? Probably. Will it be fun? Yes. I assume it is all about the kids when you have them. I wonder how true that really is. Can I still play golf? I want to go to the Masters one day. Maybe see Tiger play before I go. He's still the man you know. He might even win his first tournament back just like Bobby Jones did back in the day. He was a stud. A family man. Fuck Russia is huge eh. I want to go there some day. Maybe for the 2014 Olympics in Sochi. Who knows. Waffles is gay, did you know that? That is why he is splitting up with his wife. He is actually gay and likes men. Ok I lie, he is a good guy and needs to get some action soon or he will freakin' lose it. Go get laid dude. Seriously. I'd like to go to Turkey one day. Maybe I will make that happen in 2014 too. But if I have kids, then what. All those plans are fucked. Oh well, it will be worth it. I want to be a good dad. I want to prove that I can do it. Not be a deadbeat like my dad is/was. Ok he's not a deadbeat, but he is one selfish muthafucker that's for sure. He up and left when I was like 8 or 9 and never looked back. Tried to call me and I hung up on him. Stiffed my mom with all the bills. That shit ain't right. I told him so too. I think he is scared of me now. He won't come back to Canada that's for sure. So if I ever want to rectify things I have to go there. Fuck that, why would I waste my money? I've been to Australia already so what is the point in wasting money to see him before he goes. Come see me and fix it you loser. Man this is fun, I should do this more often. I think I will.

Peace.

Icanhazgolf

I know what you are thinking "Where has golfing Schaubs been!?"

Well thanks for asking, I've been asking myself that exact same question over the past few weeks and now that the Olympics are done, I'm back!

It all started last Sunday when I decided to play in the snowman. It's a weekly winter tournament put on by one of the public ranches we have just outside of the city. It's a par 65, so it's more of a long executive type of a course. But there is cash involved, and you know I love cash.

Lots of par 3's of all sizes with the shortest being only 90 yards and the longest at 215. There are also a bunch of reachable par 4's (8 of them between 250 and 300 yards) which makes the round a bit more exciting as we try to make those dueces on par 4's, which could also potentially count as a skin. Dueces pay cash and so do skins (best score on the hole outright).

There is one par 5 and it is my nemesis. I have talked about it here before. In fact this course is home to a pro-am I play in every year. I've finished 2nd twice and this past time I lost by one shot while shooting over par on this hole, the easiest hole on the course. FML I hate remembering that choke job.

I've reshafted my driver. It's a Ping G10 and I got fitted for a new shaft about two months ago. I haven't hit on the range yet, but I'm pounding it on the course already. It's great and definitely fills in another missing piece of my game.

On the weekend I managed to get in 27 holes. Saturday was 9 holes at my home course and then again I opted to play in the snowman once more. I'm happy to report I was under par on both outtings. Which is always nice.

-1 at home and -3 at the snowman.

My 9 hole round at home was fun - par, par, birdie, double, birdie, bogey, birdie, bogey, birdie! LOL

Nothing special happened at the snowman, but I should make a bit of money and I might have also won a KP which is usually good for a bottle or a jug. There is a low gross prize too but I won't find out the results until I return for my third week in a row next Sunday. Usually it's around -4 so I am hoping to have squeaked into the money (I probably bubbled). This Sunday is the final day of the year for the snowman tournament. Everything is worth double, there is a KP on the first hole worth $500. Lots to play for.

I've got the bug, it's back baby!! Can't wait to hit the links hard this year and make up for a year filled with 2nds and 3rds last year. Bring it on!!

The Switch

Most people remember that episode of Seinfeld when Jerry confesses that he actually likes his girlfriends roommate more than the girlfriend. It is more common than one might think. After hours and hours of deliberation George finally says "I'VE GOT IT!" and concludes that the best way to make this happen is to tell the current girlfriend (GF) that Jerry is interested in a threesome.

A menage trois.

This will "theoretically" disgust the GF and she will have no choice to break up with Jerry. The GF will run to the roommate and look for support and lament how disgusting she thinks the whole idea is. Meanwhile the roommate will console the GF all the while intrigued by the fact that Jerry is interested in her, in that way.

Well it back fired on Jerry and as he stated "She's INTO it."

George was blown away. Jerry was worried that he would have to become an orgy guy. Which is ridiculous. Who doesn't want to be an orgy guy. Big deal if you have to walk around in a robe all the time and have an arsenal of various lubes and toys. It comes with the territory.

Anyway, I was reminded of all of this because of a story a coworker told me yesterday.

He was making out with his GF on the couch. They hadn't been together for more than a month and nothing serious was going on just yet. They continued to fool around when out of nowhere the GF piped up and said she had to ask him something.

She went on to say that she wondered if it would be ok if she went out on a date with a friend of his. She said that she liked him and wanted to see if there was any chemistry. She never said which friend.

Well, being the nice guy that he was he thought "well if she doesn't like me, at least my friend might get something out of it."

So he agreed.

And with that, she got up off the couch, walked down the hall, knocked on his roommates door and went inside his bedroom.

They didn't come out until morning.

Ouch.

The Final Count

Canada had a great showing in the Vancouver 2010 Olympics. Our mantra was "own the podium." While we didn't finish at the top of the total medal standings we did own the podium when it comes to GOLD medals. As I have said before, GOLD is the only thing that matters. Funny enough, the IOC agrees as they rank the countries based on GOLD medals as well.

Here are some fun facts:

Total medals: 26

Gold: 14
Silver: 7
Bronze: 5

Top 5 finishes: 24
Top 8 finishes: 50 (tied for 1st with USA)

Members of 206 person Canadian Team who went home with at least one medal: 86

Gender of Medal Winners:
Male: 45
Women: 41

Source: Canadian Olympic Committee

Here are the final medal standings:

United States 37
Germany 30
Canada 26 (14 Gold)
Norway 23
Austria 16
Russia 15
South Korea 14
China 11
Sweden 11
France 11
Switzerland 9
Netherlands 8
Czech Republic 6
Poland 6
Italy 5
Japan 5
Finland 5 (no gold)
Australia 3
Belarus 3
Slovakia 3
Slovenia 3
Croatia 3
Latvia 2
Great Britain 1
Kazakhstan1
Estonia 1

Here are the results of my prop bets:

Dr. Pauly - Canada vs. USA - even up - $10 loss
Dr. Pauly - Canada vs. USA women's gold medal hockey final - I took Canada - $10 win
BWOP - Canada vs. CZR - (20) medals. $10. PUSH!!
PinkyStinky - Canada vs. China - (13) medals. $10 Win!
MHG - Canada Gold Only vs. Finland Gold Only - (7) medals. $5 Win!

So I came out on the positive side of things for Olympic prop bets. Which is nice. Hope to repeat these bets in 4 years! LOL

Have a good weekend and don't forget the donkament rebuy tonight if you are around (won't see me there sorry the Canucks are on!)

Preparing for Disasters

Disaster planning.

Are you ready for an earthquake? What about other natural disasters? I am not going to try and convince you to plan one way or the other but there is lots of good information out there and I think everything should at least have the minimum prepared - just in case.

My buddy Willy, whom some of you met at the most recent WPBT in December (he sat to the left of CK), has written a nice summary that I thought I would share with you. I especially worry about those of us that are located in high risk areas. Hopefully, you already know who you are.

Here is a series he wrote - I highly suggest you check it out:

Being prepared for the worst
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

I hope that none of us ever have to use these "kits" that Willy suggest we all have ready. I hope that none of us ever have to go through what they are going through in Haiti and Chile right now. Like I said, if we can all be a bit more prepared, then we will be better off and can recover that much quicker.

Once you are through those - go revisit his post about the 100 x 100 burger. He's a legend.

Brunt Video Essay

Enjoy:

Team Canada FTW!!

Sunday, Day 17.

The final event schedule for the 2010 Vancouver winter Olympics was none other than the Gold medal match. Set to go off at 12:15pm pst we were giddy with anticipation. The rematch against Team USA was set and this time - it meant something.

Up until this point Team USA had a pretty easy road to the final. Well deserved of course as they were the tops of Pool A going undefeated in the round robin portion of the tournament. As I've mentioned before the round robin only means so much. It doesn't guarantee you anything but bragging rights (as my American pals reminded me numerous times) and a bye in the first round when the tournament truly gets going.

I knew Sunday would be even more stressful than Friday. Before the puck even dropped I was somewhat nervous about the outcome and hoped that somehow we would find a way to put the puck past an extremely talented and redhot goaltendender in Ryan Miller.

You've all seen the game. Heck 80% of Canada saw some portion of the game on Sunday. Now if that stat doesn't explain how die hard us Canadians are for this sport then nothing will.

MHG emailed me and asked if he could crash at my place. I told him no problem, but it turned out that he didn't need it after all. Go check out his post as it gives you a different perspective from an American point of view.

I can't really recall how or what I was doing when I saw Crosby put that puck in the net. All I know is I had my hands clasped and accross my face as I looked up into the air and breathed a big sigh of relief. We did it. There was a lot of pent up emotion that I managed to hold in. I don't think it will ever come out the way it should, sort of like these posts I've put together. Words can not really describe the true experiences that I've had over these past 17 days. Ones that will live with me forever.

There was so much pressure on the likes of Steve Y. and the rest of the braintrust that hand picked this team one by one. Each player served a specific role and did one hell of a job showing why they were selected in the first place.

I never did win my Olympic Hockey pool. I wasn't expecting to if you recall, but I did finish in 3rd, which happened to be exactly my draft position to begin with. The all your eggs in one basket theory does not work for a short tournament such as this. Noted for 2014.

Sochi, Russia is the next stop and I've already started to toy with the idea of actually going to the games. I've already made it a mandate to go to at least one Olympic site outside of North America in my lifetime. Sochi would be fun.

This daily recap has been fun and a bit of a grind at the same time. I hope to get up some pictures, video and other general thoughts in the near future. I also need to recap my Olympic prop bets and collect a few bucks. You know who you are, no rush of course.

GoldCanadaGold!

Saturday, Day 16.

Wow, time sure has flown by just as I expected. Today was a memorable day with Canada taking down THREE gold medals in one day pushing the total Gold medals to 13.

Originally, Lola and I had big plans to head downtown and catch one last day and evening of crowded streets and screaming patriotic fans of all nations. The rain thwarted our agenda and we decided to stay in and watch all of the events unfold. Curling Gold, Boarder Slalom (men's) and long track team pursuit. It was such a rush to see us take down these medals and really put our stamp on the games.

Overall it was an extremly lazy Saturday as we mentally prepared for the BIG game on Sunday.

Fifteen

Friday, Day 15.

Today was easily the most stressful day (evening) of the Olympics thus far. I can't even really describe the feeling when I heard the crowd chanting "we want U.S.A." when the score was only 3-0 with 10 minutes to go...

Sure enough Slovaki scored off Luongo's pad to get it to 1-3 and then scored again shortly after that to warrant the closing of a rush table. I needed to focus. I admit, when it was 3-0, I too felt like it was over. I almost coolered my own team, plain and simple. I am happy to say that Team Canada rallied and shut the door. Luongo included. Phewwwwffff.

Sunday is the BIG GAME for all you Team USA lovers out there. The rematch, as it has been called. Revenge? Nahhh.

This will be an UNBELIEVABLE GAME, so be sure to check it out!

Rochette Rochette

Thursday, Day 14.

I hurried over to Thorndog's place to catch the end of the Canada vs. USA women's Gold medal final. Unsurprisingly, Team Canada was winning 2-0 with only 4 minutes to go. They grinded out those last 4 minutes and finished off Team USA in style - with a shutout.

Women pwn. Some sick stat about Canadian women in the past two Olympics - Women have accounted for ~70% of all medals for Canada. Nuts. Good job ladies!!

Funny that the women were given a hard time for drinking beer and smoking stogies on the ice after they were presented their Gold medals.

That makes 8 Gold medals for Canada now (even though they were handed 22 medals alone last night, that still only counts as one) and they still have a good chance a few more. Can't wait!

Joannie Rochette is the big story for Canada today. Slightly overshadowed by our Gold medal win in hockey, Joannie conquered what I will call the toughest task of them all - losing a loved one.

Not only did she perserver and continue to compete in the games only 48 hours after her mom passed away - she won a bronze medal!! So awesome.

I have a new respect for skating now. Individual skating specifically. I still get off on watching people (usually in couples skate) fall and I am not sure why. Maybe it is because of how hard it is to actually do what they do on skates.

I equate it to golf in a way because you are really all alone out there. No team will pick you up and make up for your mistakes or make a save after you gave up the puck. No judge to give you a score better than you deserve because you are French, or whatever.

If you fall you fall. In golf, if you miss a two foot putt for the win, that is all on you. No one else.

It takes a certain mental toughness to rise to the top, one that should not be understated. I commend Joannie for doing what she did, on the stage that she was on with the world looking and waiting for her to screw up. Everyone would have been fine if she had said "I just can't compete"... but she did the opposite. She saw it through to the end and I am sure her mother is looking down on her as proud as can be.

Tomorrow is a big day. The semi finals in men's hockey. We take on Slovaki and that should be the only team that we are thinking about heading into the game. Sure it is easy to forecast a Canada vs. USA rematch. But that will have to wait. Slovaki is good. They have a very good goaltender and two or three snipers that can rip the puck in the net.

Should be a good one!

See ya in 2014 Russia

Wednesday, Day 13.


TEAM CANADA KICKED THE CRAP OUT OF RUSSIA 7-3.

TOTAL DOMINATION.

BRING ON SLOVAKIA!!!

Team Canada Women kick ass!!

Tuesday, Day 12. We are running out of days! OMG the Olympics are almost over and I am losing most of my prop bets as it stands right now. Fawk me.

Tuesday was a day of winning, and medals lots of medals. If I recall, we won a Gold and a Silver in women's 2 "person" bobsled. We also won a Bronze is ladies 3000m and Silver in ladies 3000m relay.

Ladies kicked some serious ass!!

The big game for me, of course, was the Canada vs. Germany game which started at 4:30. I bolted from work just in time to arrive at Thorndog's (the official Team Canada Hockey games watching house) and witnessed a beat down on those pesky Germans as expected.

After it was all said and done we won 8-2. Luongo played very well and we racked up some serious points for my hockey pool team. I think I am still in 7th out of 8th but things should pick up as some teams started to get eliminated now.

So now we face Russia on Wednesday. I am very nervous about this game and hope we can pull off the victory.

Goooooooooooooo Canada goooooooooooooo!!!

Roberto Luongo's time to shine

Monday, Day 11.

This is quit a streak I am on, I must say. I'm still not sure I can maintain this pace of posting for the rest of the Olympics but I have set the goal and I will do it! There are times where I don't get the post up the day after, but it's only because life gets in the way as usual.

We won our 5th Gold on Monday. In ice dancing / figure skating. I am not sure what it is called. It is easily my least favorite sport of the games. It's a judged sport and I hope by now you can tell that I am not a fan of judged sports at all.

Too biased, too many requirements. Not enough "show up and go" type of hype. I want action, I don't want judges determining the outcome of that action. That is why I rarely, if ever bet on judged sports. There is no point. You fate is not entirely in the hands of the competitors because even if they put up a sub par performance, they still might win or get a medal.

Work got in the way of my Olympic watching as I suspect it will for the rest of the week. EXCEPT for hockey of course. The organizers were smart enough to put the games on at a time where I can sneak out of work on time and get to the comfort of a couch and a well deserved beverage or two.

Tomorrow is Germany when the real tournament begins and the single elimiation portion takes place. Lose once and you are out boys. Luongo is in net as expected as as requested. Thank you.

This is your time to shine Roberto, make it happen.

He Shoots, He Scores!!

Sunday, Day 10.

Not in the mood to talk about Sunday's ROUND ROBIN loss the the American's on our home ice. I'm just not, but I'll make a few notes just for posperity. It was a great game, but in the end the US proved to want it just a bit mroe than we did.

Round robin matches are like regular season games. They don't mean much unless you perform well in the playoffs. Sure it helps position you for some well deserved rest. Especially in this format where Canada will now have to play 4 games in 6 nights in order to obtain Gold status. Getting that extra game's rest is definitely a bonus to a teams like the US, Russia and Sweden where a majority of their team is made of of NHL stars.

NHLers have played up to 60 regular season games already. So when they can get an extra day's rest to prepare for a semi final match then they'll take it no doubt.

Sunday started off slowly for us, we have a lazy morning and basically all of our focus went into that 4:30 puck drop. We did watch a lot of Olympics on tv in the morning and early afternoon. So many events going on right now it is tough to recap all of the highlights. I guess the men's ski cross was the most dissapointing when our Canadian fell on the last bump and finished 4th overall.

That's 17 times now that Canada has placed either 4th or 5th in these Olympic games. I guess we can call this year the "Almost own the podium" year.

Within a minute of the hockey game the American's scored their first goal. Exactly what they had to do to take the crowd right out of it. We battled hard and layed 42 to shots on Ryan Miller who "stood on his head" throughout the contest.

Our next match is against those pesky Germans. As soon as we lost to the USA I was calling for Luongo to start. Hopefully that happens and he puts the team on his back and carry's us to the finals.

It won't be easy though. We now have to go through Germany, THEN Russia and THEN Sweden to get to the Gold medal game. It's gonna be a tough task, but I think we are up for the challenge. We have too much talent not to at least make it one of the best tournaments since the Canada Cup in 1987. Where the famous line was coined:

"He Shoots, He Scores!!"

Game Day at the Vancouver 2010 Olympics

Saturday, Day 9. FINALLY.

Everything was building to this day specifically because we had tickets to two events - both hockey. When I bought these tickets 10 months ago I thought I had it well planned out. I figured it was a lock that Canada would play on Saturday night, hopefully vs. USA or Russia. Surely one of the top teams would be playing a big game on a Saturday night right? RIGHT?

Wrong.

I guess Sunday was the plan for the IOC and the TV networks. In hindsight, it makes sense. Why wouldn't you save all of the big matchups for the final day of the round robin? I've kicked myself everyday up until our events and wished I had made that observation in advance and booked our live Olympic experience for Sunday instead.

Now that the events are over and done with, I don't think I would have changed anything. Lola and I knew we would have a great time but little did we know just how fantastic it truely would be. An amazing, exhilarating and once in a lifetime chance to see four countries compete at a sport that is considered by most as - Canada's game.

The adventure started off at 1pm where we drove over to the River Rock and caught the Canada line downtown. It took a good 30 minutes to get on the train, and it was jammed like something I had only seen on youtube. check it out. Ok it wasn't that bad, but seriously, it was tight!

All I could think about was getting off that train as quickly as possible. 25 minutes later we were downtown and enjoying the sites and sounds of the Olympic party in the streets. The streets were closed and the crowds were massive. As we made our way to "Canada Hockey Place" (aka GM Place, but not allowed per the IOC) we enjoyed a few street performers and stopped for a street side bratwurst.

The entry into the venue was very well run and very organized. Fenced in an protected from the non ticket holders we made our way through security. It was basically like we were at the airport. Scanners, metal detectors etc, but not too much in terms of police presence. Which was nice. Everyone was very friendly and peaceful and there were no issues whatsoever. I did have to chug my half bottle of water so it really did feel like the airport.

The first game was attended by myself, Lola and her parents. It was a blowout. Slovakia beat Latvia 6-0. Hossa, Gaborik, Chara, Vancouver's Demitra and the Montreal goalie Halak rounded out the superstars. Lativa had none.

The fans were nuts. Singing and cheering on the team. There was never a boo in the house. It was great. Faces painted, wearing their team colors and screaming at the top of their lungs. Country pride at its finest.

After the game we hit up a local bar/restuarant called Moxies. My sister arrived an hour earlier
and reserved a table. The waiting line was out the door, which was obvious and also why my sister got there and booked a table for 6. I had a couple stiff drinks to go along with my 4 beer buzz from the first game. Ahhhhh the Olympics.


The second game was a much better contest. My bro-in law is from Germany and I was taking him and my sister as a gift to them both. I had a great buzz going on as we walked back to the venue and completed the same security check again. It didn't take long at all.

We took the store entrance to the building and browsed around a bit before we made our way to the beer stand to load up. This time the stadium was filled with green and red Belarusian fans and the other half was full of crazy Germans.

I saw one girl holding up a huge German flag and on the second stripe of the flag it had written in black ink "The Hoff." Respect the Hoff. He is an icon in Germany.

The Germans sang all sorts of songs. Some of them I suspect were actually soccer songs, but I had no clue. My bro can speak German and there must have been 4-5 instances where Germans would come up to him and start speaking random German to him. He's a bit rusty so once they figured out he couldn't converse they went on their way. Stubborn Germans.

Did I mention I was German too? I had to pull for Germany, but secretly I was also pulling for Belarus as I wanted to see a competitve game go down to the wire. While it was exciting how Germany came back from a 3-1 deficit, they did lose in the end 5-3. Every single goal that Belarus scored was a beauty.

4 beers later and we were being ushered out into the masses on the street. It was nuts. A sea of people. The lineup to catch the train was ridiculous. So much so that we decided to walk down to waterfront station where the torch was lit up and on display.

We caught the train at 12am and the ride home was a breeze. An awesome and most memorable time at the Vancouver Olympics for sure.

Good times eh.

Judged sports shouldn't count

Friday, Day 8.

I had nothing to do with the Olympics for the most part. We did pick up our 4th Gold Medal on this day when Jon Montgomery - Canada's newest Golden Boy - shocked the skeleton sporting world.

In true Canadian fashion after he was declared the official winner he was handed a jug of ice cold beer and proceeded to chug a good portion of it with the crowd. Awesome.

Most of Friday night was spent playing poker with Dr. Fag at the FCPC. @whatupwilly was in town for the weekend so we met up and tossed around the chips. Fuel cashed and so did Willy's bro Andre. Nice work fish heads. I might have bubbled...

Saturday is the big day. The day I get to finally use these Olympic tickets that I have had burning a hole in my safe for a few weeks now. I bought them about 10 months ago and I can't wait to experience the games live and in person with 22,000 other hockey fans.

I leave you with this little tidbit that goes on to explain how the real medal count is the one that we should be watching. These judged sports are a bit of a joke I must agree.

Team Canada's wake up call

Thursday, Day 7. Ok I must admit, this is getting a bit tiresome... but I will not stop never fear! I just wish I could get a bit more feedback, but what can I expect when all I am really doing is writing up daily recaps of my Olympic experiences. No feedback necessary.

These weekedays are kinda boring though because work keeps getting in the way of some long time fun. I usually only have 2-3 hours in the evening to squeeze in some Olympic stuff and for the most part it is spent at friends houses or my own watching the events and cheering on the competitors.

The big days are the men's hockey game days and Thursday was no exception. It was too close for comfort and I was definitely nervous after the Swiss scored their second goal with 10 seconds left in the second period to make it a 2-2 tie. So much for calling back to back scores in the games.

That was Team Canada's wake up call. I hope so for Canada's sake anyway. If they were to lose or not at least make it to the Gold Medal game it would be a complete disappointment from a Canadian hockey fans perspective.

Luckily, this would not be the night. No one scored another goal in the third period and we were off to overtime where, again, no one scored. So it was shoot out time and Sid Crosby put it away on the 4th shot (his second of the shootout, which I did not know was allowed) and managed to put it past Jonas Hiller for the game winning goal.

We had to split the first two points. Each game is worth 3 points. If you go to overtime, that's a point each and the win is worth another point. So we get two of three which really does suck actually.

Why? Well it makes Sunday's game against the USA all the more important. If we lose that one we might even risk the chance of not getting a first round bye... terrible. I have faith though and believe that Canada is the better team who is just starting to hit their stride.

Look out USA!

Any side bets on this single game? I will take all bets of $10 or less. Do it.

The highlight of my Olympic night was when I was told about the cowbell 2010 app for my itouch. It was $0.99 but worth it. You can choose your country flag to cover your cowbell and ring it until your hearts content. You can get medal updates and it also has the events schedule so that right there is worth it.

Check it out if you dare...

The weather here has been beautiful. Sunny every day for the last 3-4 days. It's been great for all of the visitors and I know that there has been some negativity shed about our fair city. I wonder what some of you have heard? Anyone out there care to confess what they've been hearing about the games and our city of Vancouver over the past week? Are people being little whinny bitches about the lack of snow?

Sean White is a modest King amongst men

Wednesday, Day 6. Not much in the way of Olympic stuff on this day. I witnessed Team USA winning three gold medals (fawk) and Canada won one. Sean White should be in his own league, he is that good. Maelle Ricker won a gold medal for Canada in the Ladies boarder cross and she was so giggle and nervous afterwards, very cute.

I caught a bit of the CTV coverage and saw most of the highlights. Shani Davis won a gold medal in 1000m Men's speed skating and Lindsey Vonn won a gold in Ladies downhill. Congrats to both. I will blame them when I lose my prop bet to Pauly.

Here is a recap of how the bets are going:

Pauly - USA 14, Canada 6. Straight up. I am waaaaay behind here, but I have faith.

BWoP - CZR 2, Canada 6. I need 14 more to tie...

PinkyStinky - China 4, Canada 6. I need 11 more to tie...

MHG - Finland 0 gold, Canada 2 gold. I need 5 more to tie... do I look worried?

Thursday is game two of pool A in Canadian Men's hockey. This time they are up against Switzerland and Brodeur will be in net. He will need to post a shut out tonight if he wants to start on Sunday against USA. Otherwise it will be back to Luongo from what I hear.

My prediction - Canada 7, Switzerland 1.

Can I go two for two? Unlikely.

NBC thinks tape delay is a good idea #Olympics2010

Tuesday, Day 5. I watched more Olympic coverage on my lunch break. USA hockey pulled out a 3-1 win against the Swiss. I heard on the radio that the goalie Ryan Miller had to cover up part of his goalie helmet that said "Miller Time" on it. I assume it is just his long time nickname and not a beer sponsorship reference.

Team Canada took on Norway and unsurprisingly they clobbered them with Roberto Luongo getting the shutout. With about two minutes to go the score was 8-0 Canada and I was hoping that it would remain that way... and it did. I guess I can call the score with the best of them sometimes.

I caught the game over at Thorndog's place and we watched it live instead of on PVR because we just couldn't stand to not celebrate each goal with the rest of the country in real time. If we had been living in the USA who knows when we would have found out about it via NBCitsometimelater tape delay antics.

We won a gold medal in the Women's boarder cross which brings our medal count up to 5 at the end of Day 4. Not bad, but we are still chasing the powerhouse's that are USA and Germany. I expect Canada to put up some more medals shortly so we should be able to keep pace. My prop bets aren't looking too bad so far.

After the Hockey game we fired up LOST, which was much more exciting to say the least. Don't get me wrong, watching Team Canada kick the crap out of some team that barely belongs there in first place is fun - especially when my guys put up a bunch of points for my pool, but I would much rather try to figure out who's name will be next to be crossed off the list of names written on the cave. My guess is Hurley, sorry big guy.

Or where Sawyer gets all of that Whiskey from? Or how the evil Locke can just transform into smoke whenever he wants. Or who the little boy is? My guess is it's a young Jacob... and not Aaron as some others have written about.

Anyway, we move on to Day 6. What will it bring? Will it be another medal for Canada, maybe this time in Alpine skiing?

Canada's next Hockey game is Thursday vs. The Swiss and then the big one to end the round robin play of Group A will be on Sunday vs. the all might USA.

Any prop bets DoubleDave?

Bode Miller seems uninterested

Monday, Day 4. Work is now officially in the way of my Olympic watching time and it is rather annoying. I did get a chance to watch some downhill during lunch and saw that the ever popular Bode Miller won a Bronze Medal. No one really likes him from what I could tell and he has never really shown much interest in the Olympic games and what they really mean. Heck, even NBC was slagging him from time to time.

Canada won a silver medal in boarder cross, so that was cool. It came down to the wire and right near the end the "jeans wearing" American gobbled up the lead and pass him on the 2nd to last jump as a result of more speed. Wescott defended his 2006 title. Congrats. maybe next time Mike Robertson. He was very humble, as most Canadians are.

After work I rushed over to a buddies place to get our Olympic Men's hockey pool going. There were eight of us there and we completed it rather quickly. Only selecting 6 forwards and 2 defense each, we were done in less than an hour.

Here's my team (notice I did not take a single Russian or American):

From Team Canada:
Heatly
Geztlaf
Toews
Doughty (D)
Seabrook (D)

From Team Sweden:
Hornqvist
Pahlsson
Zetterberg

Obviously I am hoping for a Sweden vs. Canada Final. I do think the Russians will do very well in this tournament if their defense can hold up against either Canada or Sweden in the semi-finals. However, I figured if I am goiNG to win this pool then I shouldn't spread myself too thin and take a guy from each team (like some of my competitiors did). I am not sure what the optimal strategy is... but for ten bucks I figured I might as well be a homer and cheer for my team as much as possible.

We did manage to make some prop bets during the draft. We were betting $2 on every race during the 500m men's long track sprint. We alternated picking first and then realized that there was usually a clear favorite. So we added another 25% juice to the players bet that got to pick first. Good times.

Jeremy Wotherspoon tanked out for his last official Olympic race. Nice career though I must say.

Today I am wearing my Canadian Flag sweater for obvious reasons.

Game 1 of the qualifying round robin goes on Tuesday. Norway vs. Canada.

My prediction: Canada 8 Norway 0.

Goooooooooooo CANADA!!

Watchin' the Olympics from my lazyboy

Day 3, Sunday. I spent almost the entire day watching the Olympics on TV. ctvolympics.ca is by far the best website out there for coverage. As far as my choices for tv stations to watch, usually there are four or five. Lola and I had a nice dinner for Vday where I fired up a couple of filet's on the bbq. A meal that even Astin would be proud of.

NBC sucks because they are on tape delay so I feel sorry for all of those following me on twitter who are subject to results spoilage. Too bad I guess, not sure I can avoid showing my excitment when Canada takes down their first gold of the games!!!!! First ever on home soil. Pretty awesome.

Mogules are so much better to watch on TV because of all the great camera angles. However, nothing will ever compare to the feeling you would have had being there for the event. The crowd went into a non-stop frenzy. I heard that they ran out of food and water at Cypress last night. LOL yikes.

3 medals so far. 1 of each. Not too bad after 3 days but we should be able to get about 6 in total in long track speed skating (mostly from the women).

Men's hockey kicks off shortly and to get into the spirit a few of us are getting together to do a Olympic Hockey Pool on Day 4.

We have the TV running here at work so I plan on spending my lunch break in the conference room catching up on the morning action each day.

I seriously could watch the Olympics all day every day. I can't get enough!!

12 hours of live Olympic experiences 2010

Day 2. Saturday morning. The day after a very fun and memorable Day 1. It was just like old times hanging our with my standard crew. Started out as 7, finished as 3. The usual.

I woke up with a screaming head ache, back ache and arm ache. Couldn't figure it out... and I some of it hit me at different parts of Day 2. Maybe it was the pullout bed or maybe it was the uncountable number of glasses of Heineken I took down. Liquid gold I tell ya.

Lola and I decided to go downtown. Met up with a few others that were already there and basically just walked the city and enjoyed the spirit of the games.

We took the Canada line down and got off at City Center. The streets were shutdown and there was a sea of people cast over Robson Square. People from all nations were wandering the streets.

Then we headed to Yaletown. Maybe a 20 minute walk. But this was no ordinary walk. Nothing about this experience has been ordinary. We had lunch at the Hub restaurant. I had a wicked beef dip and split a jug of 1516 with Dthong. Dthong is Lola's best bud. She's a hoot and holds her own when it comes to drinking. Dthong had an in at the Hub, but surprisingly we didn't need to excercise the option as we lucked out and got a seat right on the patio where we able to soak in more spirit.

After lunch we walked over to David Lam park to watch the band Default. Free concert goodness. The place was pounding out music, which took quite a while to get too. Maybe another 20 minute walk. Broke in the new shoes nicely.

Beer buzz on, we take a left and see the entrance way. Then the lineup started... and kept going... and going, and going around three citl bock lengths. Nuts. We made a pact that we would not line up. Not on Day 2. We wanted to maximize the fun and not kill the buzz (although the line was moving... so I exclaimed) so we agreed that no lineups were to be had unless it was our last resort.

So we hopped in a cab and headed over to Gastown. Another town you say? Not really... it's basically like taking a cab from The MGM Grande to the Venetian. Not worth the walk, that's for sure.

We arrived at the German House and the lineup was big, but tolerable. We still weren't prepared to wait when you could just go next store to Steamworks for a few. We wanted more beer!

Fortunately, Dthong had the in. It was one of those ins that I have only really heard about or read about until now. Or seen in a movie. Yeah, like a move! One of those mob style ones. One of those Goodfellas type moments.

We sat outside while text messages flew back and forth. Our in was in a meeting and we sat tight until we got the word. Skipping this 1000 person lineup was within reach and beer was only moments away. No need for a bracelet. Not even a security check.

I had never even met this girl - the in. She hooked us up and hooked us up good. We basically waited for the exact moment. It wasn't a sneak in either. Like we went through the kitchen type of a move. Over one rope and through the back entrance of the tent and we were ordering beer 5 minutes later.

The place wasn't even jammed. It was not like the Holland house at all. Security was lacking, the design was weak. There was no authentic German type of stuff at all. I wasn't about to complain to the in though as that would just be foolish.

I will say that they did bring in their own food, beer and a band. They lacked the TV coverage although the people space was very limited. The beer was awesome. German Pilsner, your choice of light or dark. I chugged the lighter colored liquid gold and at a medium pace.

We watched the ladies mogules on the big screen and saw one of the Canadians earn our first medal. A Silver medal at that. Well done. I am sure most of you witnessed the one wipe out. Oh and USA taking Gold and Bronze was a plus for my American readers. They are out to an early lead in the Medal count.

Heineken House of liquid GOLD

Friday night, Day 1 of the Olympics in my home city. What an absolute honor. I'll try to highlight my daily activity and bring you a little insight... Schaubs style.

I took off from work early and headed to the Shed for a few beers and the Canucks game. At 6pm we went over to the Ozone / Heineken House. I never did leave the Heineken house (located inside the ozone property) and missed out on the Ozone experience. Good thing this was only day 1.

I took lots of video. If I ever figure it out, I'll put some up.

The Holland Heineken House was awesome. They imported their own beer. My favorite beer. Some ridiculous amount of beer. They also had an ice cold version that was only served up top in the Restaurant. It was cold. Ice cold and delicious.

Most of these houses bring their own band. Usually a cover band/well known band in their own country type of band.

The Dutch also brought their own staff. Nice, friendly, polite, good looking people.

Day 1 was a success.

Let the Games begin!!

Any other prop betters out there need to post their action before the end of Friday (today).

Here are the bets that have been made:

Dr. Pauly - Canada vs. USA - reluctantly, I gave him even up medals because I wanted the action and it was only one medal. $10.

BWOP - Canada vs. CZR - (20) medals. $10.

PinkyStinky - Canada vs. China - (13) medals. $10.

MHG - Canada Gold Only vs. Finland Gold Only - (7) medals. $5.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CANADA GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Olympic Medal Prop Bets - Canada vs.

Anyone interested in betting on the Olympics? Let's make it a simple prop bet involving the medal standings. Here are the 2006 results (Gold, Silver, Bronze, Total) ranked by total gold medals... because we all know that winning the gold is the only thing that matters!

1. Germany 11 12 6 29
2. United States 9 9 7 25
3. Austria 9 7 7 23
4. Russia 8 6 8 22
5. Canada 7 10 7 24
6. Sweden 7 2 5 14
7. South Korea 6 3 2 11
8. Switzerland 5 4 5 14
9. Italy 5 0 6 11
10. France 3 2 4 9
10. Netherlands 3 2 4 9
12. Estonia 3 0 0 3
13. Norway 2 8 9 19
14. China 2 4 5 11
15. Czech Republic 1 2 1 4
16. Croatia 1 2 0 3
17. Australia 1 0 1 2
18. Japan 1 0 0 1
19. Finland 0 6 3 9
20. Poland 0 1 1 2
21. Belarus 0 1 0 1
21. Bulgaria 0 1 0 1
21. United Kingdom 0 1 0 1
21. Slovakia 0 1 0 1
25. Ukraine 0 0 2 2
26. Latvia 0 0 1 1

I will handicap it based on the above standings. If you want Latvia, I will give you a 23 medal spread. If you want Germany, then you give me a 5 medal spread. If you want to bet on gold medals only, then that is cool too. We will use the same structure.

I am open to any and all offers (not saying I will accept every single wager, but I will consider it). Send me an email or post your prop here in the comments and I will confirm whether it is a go. Paypal, FT or PS transfers are acceptable. Pay at the end of the Olympics... who knows maybe the men's gold medal hockey final will be the match that decides our bet!

Go Canada Go!!

Olympic Torch Relay

We just stepped outside of our office to witness the torch relay. I gotta say it was pretty cool, even if it did come and go in less than 30 seconds. Which is what I expect of the actual games as well. Before you know it, the games will be over. So soak it in and enjoy. GO Canada GO!!

SCOOP ticket win, live cash game beat

I neglected to mention that I did play in one event during the WBCOOP. In fact, so did Lola. But before I get to that... was it just me or did everyone only get 2 tournament tickets? I am not sure if it was because I am a low limit low level donk or what the deal is but when I went to retrieve my tickets there were only two sitting there.

Knowing that I could only play in one or two events anyway I decided to sign up for the Thursday tournament and the Saturday tournament. I obviously had no clue how all of this was working because had I known there was a main event I would have only signed up for the weekend tournaments. For some reason I thought that the Sunday event was some sort of finals that everyone was trying to qualify for throughout the week (sort of like the BBT).

Little did I know that Sunday was just another tournament classified as the Main Event. In hindsight I should have known and used my second ticket on Sunday's event. I was home but had slept in from the night before. I didn't get home until 5am Sunday morning because I had drunkenly decided to take a run at the 100K bad beat jackpot over at the River Rock.

I did see a bad beat, but it was on myself and it didn't warrant the big 100K table payout. After about an hour of play I limped pocket 6's UTG knowing that there would be a raise somewhere. Guy UTG+1 called the $2 blind and then the button raised it to $12. BB called, I called and so did UTG+1.

The dream flop of 6-8-8 came out and I just flopped a full house. Two checks and UTG+1 leads out for $20. Under bet, but a bet nonetheless. It folds to me and I raise it up another $45. He shoves his remaining stack and I have him covered. It was another $100ish to me and I called hoping I had him beat or he had quads and we could take a run at the 100K bad beat pot. He flips over J-8 for trips and I am in good shape... right?

Turn 9, river 9. FML, I took it very well though. I was calm and just decided that poker was a dirty whore and didn't like me much at all at that point. Screw you poker, even when I get it in ahead you fuck me over.

Anyway, back to the tournament ticket I won on Saturday. I had to work and the tournament started at 12pm my time. I managed to talk Lola into playing the first hour and told her specifically to only play the biggest of big hands (AA, KK, QQ, AK) and that is it. She did, and did very well. When I got home at 1pm she had accumulated 8k in chips already! WTG!!

I kept those chips working for another 3 hours and when it was 4pm the Canucks game was about to start and I was already late for the party over at the shed. I called my buddy and told him I was ITM for an $11 ticket and had a push or fold type of stack of about 16BB's. I live open pushed with him on the phone with AQ and got called by KK and AK. GG me.

So yeah, one free roll tournament, one tournament ticket win to the SCOOP and the other free roll tournament ticket went to waste on Thursday. I had no clue what the SCOOP ticket was for until LJ or someone else told me. I actually thought it was for the finals when I first won it LOL.

I railed Lightning36 in the Main Event while playing in a $3 tourney on Sunday. AA went down to a flopped set of 7's. Just another day of poker in the Schaub's hood.

My name is Schaubs, and I suck at poker!